One reader didn’t expect to get pregnant at her age but wants to keep it – she wants Coleen’s advice about what to do now
Image: Getty Images)
I’m a woman in my late 40s and I was shocked to find out I’m pregnant. I thought I was going through the menopause, but no, my GP confirmed the pregnancy.
I’m due to go for a scan soon, but I haven’t told my husband about the baby yet. I know he’s going to be upset and stressed because he made it clear he didn’t want any more kids after our youngest was born.
We already have a 12-year-old and a 14-year-old, and he has an older son from his first marriage.
We never even entertained the possibility of having any more children, so this will be a huge shock.
I don’t know how I feel apart from stunned, and I don’t know how I’ll cope at my age, but I do know I want to keep the baby.
It feels like a miracle at this point in my life to be honest and I want to embrace it and just hope for the best. I’m fit, healthy and very young at heart, so that’s a good start, right?
I’d love your perspective and any ideas on how I can convince my husband to go for it.
‘My husband is a serial cheat – now one of his lovers wants to blow up his life’
Well, I think you have to start by telling him – maybe give him a brandy and tell him to sit down first!
OK, here’s the thing, you don’t know how he’ll react to the news – he’ll probably be shocked, but he might be happy about this new journey.
It is different from getting pregnant again when you already have two young children. Your kids are older now, more independent and less demanding, plus they can help out with the baby.
Have the discussion with your husband and listen to his point of view, even though you’ve clearly made up your mind. And if he gets all high and mighty, remind him that it took two of you to make the baby.
I know it’s Christmas, but you’re not the Virgin Mary!
I think it’s important to plan and talk about how you’ll cope – in terms of finances, work and your other children.
Also, be realistic – you feel young and healthy now, but you might not feel great in another 10 years when your child is only 10 and you’re in your late 50s.
Talking and planning are key, but it’s a joyous thing, so congratulations.